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Funny But True Stories - 2

This is page 2 of of funny but true stories.

Police who asked a legless negro beggar in Oklahoma City to establish his identity were led round the corner where his brand new car was waiting with his chauffeur. - News Agency

WOMAN ON PHONE IS HARD TO STOP - ROANOKE, Virginia, November 29 (AP). Have phone, will talk. That seems to have been the view of a woman who set some kind of record by talking to the Roanoke Police Department for exactly seven hours and fifteen minutes Friday night and Saturday. The police did not identify the lady by name. She called at I 1.44 P.m. last night and reported a watch stolen. Once that complaint was disposed of she launched into a conversation which covered practically everything from home furnishings to politics. Busy police answered other calls but the lady kept right on talking. The end came shortly after 7 a.m. She began to slur her words, then came what police described as a soft bump followed by snoring. - Georgia paper

The ground at Sheffield yesterday was frost-bound and though liberally treated with sand, 16,ooo spectators were soon laughing at the antics of the players. - Sunday paper

Question. How can you tell the age of a snake? Answer. It is extremely difficult to tell the age of a snake unless you know exactly when it was born. Detroit News

A Marseilles fisherman made the biggest catch of the day over last weekend. He hooked a 12-st. 12-lb. skin diver blowing bubbles and a wide range of adjectives. - B.B.C. Roundabout Programme

Wanted to buy: playpen, cot and high chair; also two single beds. - Hawkes Bay Herald Tribune, N.Z.

According to the rangers in Shenandoah National Park, Virginia, the bears chew up the redwood signs posted reading: `DON'T FEED THE BEARS.' - New York Post

All through the night London police were combing the underworld for the three youths who escaped over the wall from Wormwood Scrubs jail, London. Mrs Johnson was picking blackberries on Wednesday afternoon when she saw a length of black rope thrown over. A wooden ladder followed, and three men dropped on to the grass in the lane which divides Mrs. Johnson's garden from the prison wall. ` I thought they were dodging out for a cup of tea, and intended to go back again,' said Mrs Johnson. `I did not bother to raise the alarm.' - Daily Express

LET US QUOTE A PRICE TO ARRANGE YOUR REMOVAL - Sign in Croydon furniture shop

Corned beef was sent to a Bridgend school canteen. Teachers sniffed it and did not like it. A canteen manageress sniffed it, but pronounced it good; the town sanitary inspector sniffed it and passed it as good; the town medical officer sniffed it and declared it good - then ordered it to be destroyed because too many people had sniffed it. - Daily Express

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Make love, not war
I'm married, I do both

If you want to read more stories like this, you will find them in the Graffiti - the amusing writing on walls category.