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Doctor, Doctor Jokes

A selection of Doctor, Doctor jokes.

Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking that I'm the invisible man
Well, I can't see you now.

One man came to the Doctor and said "Doctor, Doctor I feel like a bee" and the doctor replied "Well buzz off then!"

Submitted by : Cameron 

Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I'm a bottle of gin.
I think you need a little tonic.

Doctor, doctor. I'm becoming invisible.
Yes, I can see that you're not all there.

Doctor, doctor, I think I've been bitten by a vampire.
Drink this glass of water.
Will it make me better?
No, but I'll be able to see if your neck leaks.

Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pencil.
Doctor: Can we get to the point.

Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm shrinking.
Doctor: Well, you'll just have to be a little patient.

Doctor, Doctor, I keep seeing pink elephants.
Have you seen a psychiatrist?
No - only pink elephants.

Doctor to Patient: Do you want the good news or the bad news first?
Patient: The good news, please.
Doctor: The good news is that you have only twentyfour hours to live.
Patient: If that's the good news, what's the bad news?
Doctor: I should have told you yesterday.

My dad went to the doctor. He said, 'I think I'm an elastic band.'
The doctor said, 'Stretch yourself out on the couch.'

Here is a randomly selected joke

My brother got thrown out of the zoo last week. I said, 'Why was that?'
He said, 'I fed the monkeys.'
I said, 'You got thrown out of the zoo for feeding the monkeys?'
He said, 'Yes, I fed them to the lions.'

You can find more jokes like this in the Jokes For Children category.